**Check out 2008′s beautiful works of christmas sweater art**

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1. Christmas Sweaters that Suck
2. 12 Days of Holiday Gifts That Suck – Fugly Sweaters
3. 12 Days of Holiday Gifts that Suck – Spiritual Experience

Ok, if she’s not a witch, how do you explain the two strangely blurred out faces in the family photo on her web site?

In all seriousness though, they all talk about cutting spending, putting money back in out pockets, the horrible economy and then want $1,000,000 dollars to run a campaign ad for them. Really?!?? What else could we do with a million dollars? If they’re so concerned with cutting spending, why can’t they prove it with their campaigns? Quit with the attack ads, the constant commercials on tv, flyers in the mail, web sites slamming the other candidates (http://www.coonsthetaxman.com/) and show us how fiscally conservative they really are.

Related posts:

1. More on poor Ohio…
2. It makes me feel better knowing Bush will be gone next month
3. 12 Days of Holiday Gifts That Suck – Katana Practice Sword

Fans want to know…will it be resurrected?!?

From the Dayton Daily News:

Also gathered along Union Road were Franklin twins and storm chasers Levi and Seth Walsh, who said they were out in the thunderstorm when they heard about the fire through a Facebook update.

“It sent goosebumps through my whole body because I am a believer,” said Levi Walsh, 29. “Of all the things that could have been struck, I just think that that would be protected. … It’s something that’s not supposed to happen, Jesus burning,” he said. “I had to see it with my own eyes.”

“I can’t believe Jesus was struck,” said his brother, who noted the giant Hustler Hollywood sign for the adult store across the street was untouched. “It’s the last thing I expected to happen.”

"What's Left of Jesus" - Image & Title from the DDN

Related posts:

1. Bill O’Reilly totally sucks
2. More on poor Ohio…
3. Love Sucks

History of this case:

“Oh no, I can’t poop!!! I saw a commercial that said Activia Yogurt and DanActive Yogurt will make me poop like a normal person. Jamie Lee Curtis endorses it, and she seems like she poops. But wait, I’m broke, I guess I’ll spend my last $3 on some yogurt. I’ll be poor, but at least I’ll be able to poop.”

“Hey wait, I ate a cup of yogurt and I still didn’t poop right. I think I’ll sue ‘em to make back my $3 and help some lawyers get $10,000,000 plus expenses.”

So then, some class action lawyers took on the case and found out that other people used a lack of common sense and bought the yogurt to make them poop. Since they ate cheeseburgers, mac and cheese, pizza and pounds of meat, their poop still didn’t come out right. Alas, it was not magical miracle yogurt. It was just yogurt with natural cultures and probiotics that can help to support a healthy digestive tract.

Well, Dannon got a little worried that they may end up fighting a case in court and being taken for bajillions in damages and legal fees. They had played every scenario out in their minds…A jury full of constipated yogurt eaters, a judge with diarrhea, a bailiff missing work for a colonoscopy… It all seemed like too big of a risk for Dannon. They chose to settle out of court.

The settlement details from dannonsettlement.com:

“Dannon has agreed to create a $35,000,000.00 fund for the settlement. This fund will be used to pay valid claims submitted by Class Members, the costs to notify the Class about this Lawsuit and the settlement, the costs to administer the settlement, class representative incentive awards, and payment of the attorneys representing the Class and related litigation expenses. If the total amount of valid claims submitted exceeds $35 million less the costs, awards and fees set forth above, Dannon has agreed to supplement the fund by an amount necessary to pay all eligible claims, up to an additional $10 million.”

Anyhow, when you go look at more details, you’ll find out that you can file a claim and join the class to receive your part of the settlement that it is utterly ridiculous. If you don’t have a receipt for your yogurt purchase (seriously, who saves them?) you get $15. If you spent more than $15 but less than $30 on yogurt, you must attest to the fact that you did indeed spend that much. If you spent between $30 and $100 you must show proof of purchase to get your money from Dannon.

So it kind of makes you wonder why anyone would get involved with such a silly lawsuit. Was it really worth it for the person having issues pooping that they thought could be solved by yogurt? Of course not. It was ridiculous…Until you read the part about the hearing for the $10,000,000 plus expenses for the lawyers.

I can’t imagine what kind of judge lets these cases go through the court. Can they punish Dannon for stupidly settling for  close to $60,000,000 because someone claimed false advertising? So now they have to add some words to the package and commercials to tell people it isn’t a poop cure-all. Wow. That makes sense.

To learn more about the ridiculous and silly settlement, you can download the pdf here: http://www.dannonsettlement.com/sa.pdf

I ate my yogurt. It tasted good and made my belly full. Just because it didn’t perform miracles for me, doesn’t give me reason to sue.

Now, I do have an idea for another class action lawsuit…

So we’re gonna stay up late and watch Nightmare on Elm Street. Then we’re gonna go buy a whole bunch of Red Bulls. Then we’re gonna try to not fall asleep. Then, when we wake up the next morning, we’re gonna find a silly law firm that needs to make a couple-ten million dollars, and we’re gonna sue Red Bull for our money back and a whole bunch of legal fees. Hurry, run, quick, go to Netflix, add Nightmare on Elm Street to your queue, get some Red Bulls (save your receipt) and we’re gonna have us a class action suit!

Any other brilliant ideas for some class action suits?

Related posts:

1. 12 Days of Holiday Gifts that Suck – Spiritual Experience
2. Campaign Ads
3. Advanced Carb & Ignition in Dayton, Ohio

The map and directions below are for a trip from Seattle, WA, USA to Sydney, Australia. That is an incredibly ambitious trip! I, personally, would prefer a more direct route if I were going to go insane and kayak across the pacific ocean!

View Larger Map
Here’s the directions – read them carefully!

Suggested routes

Seattle, WA

1.	Head northeast on Broad St toward Taylor Ave N		0.5 mi
2.	Turn left at Westlake Ave N		1.6 mi
3.	Turn right at 4th Ave N		0.2 mi
4.	Turn right at N 34th St		0.3 mi
5.	Turn right at Stone Way N		128 ft
6.	Turn left at N Northlake Way		0.2 mi
7.	Kayak across the Pacific Ocean Entering Hawaii		2,756 mi
8.	Slight right at Turtle Bay Hilton		0.1 mi
9.	Turn left at Kuilima Dr		0.5 mi
10.	Turn right at HI-83/Kamehameha Hwy		10.5 mi
11.	Continue on Joseph P Leong Hwy		1.9 mi
12.	Slight right at HI-99/Kamehameha Hwy Continue to follow Kamehameha Hwy		8.6 mi
13.	Merge onto I-H2 S via the ramp to Honolulu		8.2 mi
14.	Merge onto I-H1 E		4.5 mi
15.	Take exit 13B to merge onto HI-78 E/I-H201 E		4.7 mi
16.	Merge onto I-H1 E		3.8 mi
17.	Take exit 23 for Punahou St		0.2 mi
18.	Turn right at Punahou St		0.1 mi
19.	Turn right at S Beretania St		0.1 mi
20.	Turn left at Kalakaua Ave		1.9 mi
21.	Kayak across the Pacific Ocean Entering Japan		3,879 mi
22.	Turn right toward 県道263号線		0.3 mi
23.	Turn left toward 県道263号線		0.2 mi
24.	Turn right at 県道263号線		0.3 mi
25.	Slight left to stay on 県道263号線		200 ft
26.	Turn left to stay on 県道263号線		0.3 mi
27.	Turn right at 国道125号線		0.4 mi
28.	Turn left at 亀城公園北（交差点） onto 国道354号線		0.4 mi
29.	Slight left at 千束町（交差点） to stay on 国道354号線		2.0 mi
30.	Turn right at 中村陸橋下（交差点） to stay on 国道354号線		1.0 mi
31.	Take the ramp to 常磐自動車道 Toll road		0.3 mi
32.	Keep left at the fork, follow signs for 東京 and merge onto 常磐自動車道 Toll road		23.8 mi
33.	Take exit 三郷ＪＣＴ toward 首都高・銀座・湾岸線 Toll road		0.7 mi
34.	Merge onto 首都高速6号三郷線 Toll road		5.7 mi
35.	Take exit 小菅ＪＣＴ toward 湾岸線・銀座 Toll road		0.4 mi
36.	Merge onto 首都高速中央環状線 Toll road		0.4 mi
37.	Take exit 堀切ＪＣＴ on the right toward 銀座・箱崎 Toll road		0.3 mi
38.	Merge onto 首都高速6号向島線 Toll road		5.4 mi
39.	Take exit 江戸橋ＪＣＴ toward 新宿・北池袋 Toll road		0.4 mi
40.	Merge onto 首都高速都心環状線 Toll road		3.8 mi
41.	Take exit 谷町ＪＣＴ on the right toward 東名・渋谷 Toll road		0.3 mi
42.	Merge onto 首都高速3号渋谷線 Toll road		6.9 mi
43.	Continue on 東名高速道路 Toll road		189 mi
44.	Take exit 豊田ＪＣＴ toward 東海環状・伊勢湾岸道・豊田東出口・土岐ＪＣＴ・四日市・新名神 Toll road		0.3 mi
45.	Keep right at the fork, follow signs for 伊勢湾岸道・四日市・新名神 and merge onto 伊勢湾岸自動車道 Toll road		19.8 mi
46.	Take the ramp onto 伊勢湾岸自動車道 Toll road		12.1 mi
47.	Take exit 四日市ＪＣＴ toward 東名阪道・大阪・伊勢道 Toll road		0.6 mi
48.	Merge onto 東名阪自動車道 Toll road		13.8 mi
49.	Take exit 亀山ＪＣＴ toward 新名神・京都・大阪 Toll road		0.6 mi
50.	Merge onto 新名神高速道路 Toll road		30.9 mi
51.	Take exit 草津ＪＣＴ toward 草津ＰＡ・名神・京滋・京都・大阪 Toll road		0.2 mi
52.	Take exit 草津ＰＡ on the right toward 名神 Toll road		0.5 mi
53.	Merge onto 名神高速道路 Toll road		30.1 mi
54.	Take exit 吹田ＪＣＴ toward 中国道・山陽道・宝塚・岡山 Toll road		1.1 mi
55.	Merge onto 中国自動車道 Toll road		18.8 mi
56.	Take exit 神戸ＪＣＴ toward 山陽道・岡山・徳島 Toll road		0.9 mi
57.	Merge onto 山陽自動車道 Toll road		192 mi
58.	Take exit 廿日市ＪＣＴ toward 山陽道・岩国・北九州 Toll road		0.9 mi
59.	Merge onto 広島岩国道路 Toll road		7.3 mi
60.	Take the ramp onto 山陽自動車道 Toll road		59.2 mi
61.	Take exit 山口ＪＣＴ toward 中国道・下関・北九州 Toll road		0.8 mi
62.	Merge onto 中国自動車道 Toll road		39.9 mi
63.	Continue on 関門橋 Toll road		5.9 mi
64.	Continue on 九州自動車道 (signs for 九州道・福岡・熊本) Toll road		59.1 mi
65.	Take exit 鳥栖ＪＣＴ toward 大分道・大分・長崎道・長崎・佐賀 Toll road		0.3 mi
66.	Keep right at the fork, follow signs for 長崎道・長崎・佐賀 and merge onto 長崎自動車道 Toll road		75.0 mi
67.	Take exit 高速長崎ＩＣ toward ながさき出島道路・（長崎市街） Toll road		0.6 mi
68.	Merge onto ながさき出島道路/国道324号バイパス Toll road		1.8 mi
69.	Take the ramp onto 出島海岸通り/国道499号線 Partial toll road		0.4 mi
70.	Turn left at 玉江橋（交差点）		0.2 mi
71.	Turn left		482 ft
72.	Turn left		404 ft
73.	Take the 長崎~奈良尾~奈留島~福江 ferry Toll road		60.8 mi
74.	Continue straight		0.2 mi
75.	Turn right toward 国道384号線		246 ft
76.	Turn right toward 国道384号線		0.2 mi
77.	Turn left at 東浜町（交差点） onto 国道384号線		1.3 mi
78.	Slight left at 馬責馬場（交差点） onto 県道27号線		3.3 mi
79.	Turn left to stay on 県道27号線		3.7 mi
80.	Turn left at 県道31号線		0.4 mi
81.	Continue on 県道164号線		4.8 mi
82.	Turn left to stay on 県道164号線		0.2 mi
83.	Slight left at 国道384号線		2.9 mi
84.	Turn left		0.6 mi
85.	Kayak across the Pacific Ocean Entering Australia (Northern Territory)		3,358 mi
86.	Turn right at Myilly Tce		0.2 mi
87.	At the traffic circle, take the 1st exit onto Kahlin Ave		0.2 mi
88.	At the traffic circle, take the 2nd exit onto Gilruth Ave		1.1 mi
89.	Turn right at Goyder Rd		0.2 mi
90.	Turn left at Stuart Hwy		598 mi
91.	Turn left at Barkly Hwy Entering Queensland		395 mi
92.	Turn left to stay on Barkly Hwy		74.8 mi
93.	Continue on Flinders Hwy		9.1 mi
94.	Turn right at Landsborough Hwy		207 mi
95.	Turn left to stay on Landsborough Hwy		0.7 mi
96.	Turn right to stay on Landsborough Hwy Go through 2 traffic circles		177 mi
97.	Turn right to stay on Landsborough Hwy		257 mi
98.	Slight left at Warrego Hwy		57.2 mi
99.	Turn right to stay on Warrego Hwy		0.1 mi
100.	Turn left to stay on Warrego Hwy		0.3 mi
101.	Turn right at Alice St		0.8 mi
102.	Continue on Mitchell St George Rd		126 mi
103.	Turn left at Balonne Hwy		3.3 mi
104.	Turn right at Carnarvon Hwy Entering New South Wales		73.6 mi
105.	Continue on George St		0.8 mi
106.	Turn right at Yarouah St		0.8 mi
107.	Continue on Carnarvon Hwy		42.0 mi
108.	Continue on Railway Pde		3.7 mi
109.	Continue on Mungindi Rd		9.1 mi
110.	Turn right to stay on Mungindi Rd		7.1 mi
111.	Continue on Boolooroo St		1.1 mi
112.	Continue on Carnarvon Hwy		9.9 mi
113.	Turn right at Newell Hwy Go through 2 traffic circles		62.8 mi
114.	At the traffic circle, take the 3rd exit and stay on Newell Hwy		0.5 mi
115.	Turn right to stay on Newell Hwy Go through 1 traffic circle		2.1 mi
116.	At the traffic circle, take the 2nd exit onto Kamilaroi Hwy		33.7 mi
117.	Turn left to stay on Kamilaroi Hwy Go through 2 traffic circles		74.2 mi
118.	Turn right to stay on Kamilaroi Hwy		8.9 mi
119.	Turn right at New England Hwy Go through 1 traffic circle		52.8 mi
120.	Turn left to stay on New England Hwy		29.4 mi
121.	Turn right at Campbell St		0.2 mi
122.	Turn left at John St		0.7 mi
123.	Continue on Putty Rd		5.2 mi
124.	Turn left at Broke Mount Thorley Rd		9.4 mi
125.	Continue on Paynes Crossing Rd		10.6 mi
126.	Turn right to stay on Paynes Crossing Rd		7.7 mi
127.	Continue on Great North Rd		2.3 mi
128.	Turn right to stay on Great North Rd		1.8 mi
129.	Turn left to stay on Great North Rd		10.5 mi
130.	Continue on George Downes Dr		17.2 mi
131.	Turn left at Mangrove Mountain Rd		1.7 mi
132.	Slight left to stay on Mangrove Mountain Rd		2.7 mi
133.	Continue on Peats Ridge Rd		3.0 mi
134.	Take the ramp onto Sydney Newcastle Fwy		31.8 mi
135.	Take the exit toward Pacific Hwy		0.2 mi
136.	Turn left at Pacific Hwy		8.4 mi
137.	Turn left to stay on Pacific Hwy		112 ft
138.	Take the ramp onto Gore Hill Fwy		0.9 mi
139.	Continue on Warringah Fwy		2.9 mi
140.	Continue on Bradfield Hwy Partial toll road		1.2 mi
141.	Slight left to stay on Bradfield Hwy		400 ft
142.	Slight left to stay on Bradfield Hwy		0.2 mi
143.	Turn left at Grosvenor St		0.1 mi
144.	Turn right at George St		0.3 mi

Sydney NSW Australia

Related posts:

1. I wonder if their insurance covers acts of god…
2. Google, remember: DO NO EVIL!!!
3. Guess the Crime

So once upon a time, there was this dude known as President Obama… and he had this thing called an interview… during this interview, he swatted and to his suprise, killed a fly.

And most people are thinking at this point… yeah, so?

But not PETA, clearly:

PETA is sending Obama a bug catching device, which allows people to capture insects and set them free.

“It’s not a huge deal. One might even call it a non-story. But if the media wants to talk about fly-swatting, we’ll talk about compassion, even for flies.”

The White House is declining to comment.
(source)

If it’s not a huge deal, then why make the gesture?  Even the suggestion is kinda openly condescending guys.  A fly is a fly. There are millions more. If they choose to bug me, I will sure as hell bug them back.  And that may involve swatting. It may even get brutal with some squishing.  Dare I say, there may even be… splatting. Holy crap.

*rolls eyes*

There’s already an influx of giant bears and deer everywhere.  If we’re forced to be more “humane” to insects and let them all go, then we’d better gear up like Starship Troopers for some mega pest control.

Related posts:

1. Bill O’Reilly totally sucks
2. Hypocrites at PETA Suck. Plain and Simple.
3. Just when you though PETA couldn’t get more ridiculous…

Happy Valentines Day…

Related posts:

1. Bill O’Reilly totally sucks
2. 12 Days of Holiday Gifts That Suck – Billy Mays
3. 12 Days of Holiday Gifts That Suck – Katana Practice Sword

whatcha gunna do, whatcha gunna do when they come for you?

That’s right, we have a new guessing game in a brand spanking new forum:

GUESS THE CRIME

How to play: Try to figure out who did what to get arrested based on their mugshot. At the end of the day, we’ll reveal the crime and showcase the best guess.

What else is new in the forums? Well, for starters, we’re now allowing anonymous posting. That’s neat, right?  But not nearly as neat as whathca can do after signing up-> First of all, IT’S FREE and super easy.  Registered users get to have their own name, signature, a cookie AND they get to make their own topics and send each other private messages (oh la la).  Soon, they’ll also be able to add their very own profile image and rate different posts, maybe even make some polls.

Update: Registered users can now upload their own profile images! Non-registered users only get to use the default image…

A note to Facebook users: We’ve recently added Facebook Connect which allows you to leave comments using your Facebook account.  The forums don’t currently support this but we’re working on it…

‘Nother Update: With Firefox’s most recent update, there seems to be a reloading error for the Facebook Connect Plugin… we’ve taken it down for the meantime and we’ll try to get something back up in a bit =(

Related posts:

1. New Forums – Sports, Music, and Cell Phones
2. Oh Jeebus
3. New Forum Category – SPAM

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2. PETA – new Lord of the Flies
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I’m going to think really long and hard about 250 characters I can use to explain to Former (almost ) President Bush how much of a flippin’ loser I think he is. If anyone has any ideas of their own, click the link, sign the card. Do it!!

When you go there, you get to ready the super funny “card.”

President and Mrs. Bush,

Thank you for your outstanding service and courageous leadership. I am grateful for your hard work and commitment to build a better, safer, more prosperous America. Best wishes to you in the years ahead.

A better, safer, more prosperous America? What?!? Better, safer and more prosperous than when? I don’t know what drugs Rush Limbaugh has been passing out at GOP parties, but they must be good ones!

Just because he didn’t get busted getting a blow job in the Oval Office does not mean he brought honor and integrity back! In fact I think he did anything but that.

The following is the spam from the GOP. I only removed my name, email address, some html and some images asking for donations.

Related posts:

1. The Bush Administration Comes To An End!!!!
2. Oh Jeebus
3. Guess the Crime