A newly discovered photograph of the former Vice President shows it's not really his fault he is so evil. It turns out, he was born the child of satan.
At age three, poor Dick Cheney had a way too big for his body head with an old man's face on the front. He still suffers from abnormally short, t-rex arms. These things has permanently damaged him.
Until his father (Satan) decides to step down as Supreme Ruler of Hell, we are stuck with Dick Cheney here on earth.
Once his term on earth is up, the residents of hell had better watch out! They thought his dad (Satan) was bad, well they ain't seen nothin' yet!
